Visiting the first Wienerschnitzel!

America, as a country, seems to ignore the history of fast food.  The first McDonald's is long gone.   The first Burger King is also gone and is steeped in controversy. And the first Wendy's was torn down less than 10 years ago.  However, I am happy to say that the first Der Wienershnitzel is alive and well, and right here is Los Angeles!   Last year the Los Angeles City Council add the building to its list of Cultural and Historical Monuments, giving it the same designation as the Grauman's Chinese Theater, The Hollywood sign and Municipal Warehouse #1.  Now that visiting such a place can be considered a cultural expedition, I packed my coupons and headed to Wilmington, the site of the first Wienerschnitzel.

The restaurant has changed a bit since John Galardi opened it in 1961.   Originally the building looked like this.

 However, they have taken to remodeling it a bit over the years to fit with their current color schemes and signage.   Here is the restaurant that greeted me as I turned onto PCH:

However, they did have a nice plaque on the wall designating it as the first Der Wienerschnitzel.   they also had a dessert that gave me plaque, but that's another story...

As a hot dog, Der Wienerschnitzel has always left me a little cold.   They aren't the best, but they definitely "fill the bill" when you have a craving for a chili dog.  I usually get 5 chili dogs for five dollars - that's a deal that's hard to beat!  And they microwave very nicely the next day.

However, I can never forgive Der Wienerschnitzel for retiring their beloved mascot, the WienerDog.   Somewhere in my photo album I have a picture of me, age eight, posing with the WienerDog.   Ah, such memories.   I never understood why the WienerDog seemed more like a beagle or basset hound than a dachshund, but I guess Madison Avenue felt more kids would identify with a beagle.  Score one for Snoopy.

Saturday Morning Cartoon: Pink Plasma

Happy Halloween!   This year I'm posting Pink Plasma, a Pink Panther cartoon from 1975.  This one is pretty significant for me, as I am aquainted with this cartoon's director Art Leonardi.  When I was a kid our family got together with the Leonardi family on occassion, and I remember him timing out this cartoon during a visit.   He demonstrated the monster voice to me at the time, and I am reasonably sure he did all the voices / utterances you hear in the cartoon.   Enjoy!

Travels with Joe: Three Bears General Store, Pigeon Forge, Tenn

"Bear Pits" used to be found somewhat frequently in the south.    They lived up to the name:  It would be a pit filled with bears, where tourists would gather around and throw food down to the denizens therein.   I actually visited a few of them several years ago.  Since then, most of the bear pits have been closed down, as the general public has started demanding better and more natural animal exhibits in zoos and animal attractions.

However, an updated bear pit still exists in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee.  The Three Bears Gift Store updated their pit so that it is now more of a zoo-type attraction, with caves, waterfalls and a small lake for the bears to escape the southern heat.  Twice a day, they offer you a chance to feed the bears.   Guests can buy a small cup of chopped fruit and dog biscuits to toss to the bears.  Naturally, this was the type of tourist trap I can't resist, so on a recent trip to Pigeon Forge I stopped in to have lunch with the bears.

The original three bears, reportedly saved from a bankrupt zoo that had planned to sell the bears to a hunter as live game, have been joined by two more bears for a grand total of five.   The bears seem to have the tourist game down to a science, knowing who has the feeding cups and how to elicit the food from them. 

Below you can see a video of us feeding the bears.  

Saturday Morning Cartoon - LA DOT

Got two minutes?   Then take the time to enjoy this brief cut from the Animaniacs, where Dot Warner makes a startling discovery about the Los Angeles transportation system (besides the fact that we don't have one).  Enjoy!

Hold the Mascot

This week, McDonald's rolled out it's newest corporate mascot, an anthropomorphic Happy Meal box  who is imaginatively named "Happy."   Happy was immediately met by one of the biggest corporate backlashes I have seen since New Coke, the blowing up of Jack in the Box's boxes and the near-retirement of Bob's Big Boy.   For those of you who have not yet had the pleasure of being introduced to Happy, here is a picture of your favorite fast-food container.

Hi!  I'm Happy!  I will haunt your dreams!

Immediately the seven dwarfs disavowed any knowledge of Happy's existence.

Happy brings to mind one of my favorite adages:  Computer generated characters are often not the most appealing things in the world.  There have been many CG-created characters that are downright ugly...  The Polar Express comes immediately to mind.   But who thought that this character would be appealing to the hamburger-eating populace?   In my opinion, he's scary...  an opinion shared by the vast majority of McDonald's twitter followers, who have responded to the McDonald's announcement in a huge, vitriolic no-confidence vote.   I direct you to the twitter feed (Caution:   Naughty words ahead):  https://twitter.com/McDonalds/status/468466673784455169/photo/1

McDonald's has a pretty good track record in creating memorable mascots, from Mayor McCheese to Grimace.   However, Happy isn't the only creepy character they have foisted on the fast-food loyalists.   Remember the creepy 'Mac Tonight" moon that came out in the 1980's?  A lounge singer with a giant crescent moon for a head, he sang a version of Mac the Knife inviting you to enjoy "Mac Tonight."  Despite the commercial's success, I know I was not alone in being freaked out by Mac Tonight.   Good Night, Moon.

Mcdonald's Mac Tonight character borders on lunarcy. 

Of course, Mcdonald's is not alone in creating creepy mascots.   One of the worst was the Burger King circa 2008.   Burger King has had a bad time with mascots, ranging from Kurber Bing to the Marvelous Magical Burger King.  In the early 2000's they rolled out my vote for the creepiest one ever, the ever silent, ever smiling Burger King.   He shows up, silent and with a giant king mask over his face, offering people burger king sandwiches.   And amazingly, they eat it.  Each commercial seems like a set up to a horror movie, and ends similarly (depending on your opinion of Burger King sandwiches).  Here's an example, watch it in a well-lit room:



Jack-in-the-Box has a pretty nice mascot now...   but back in the 1970's they tried to create a cast of characters similar to the McDonaldsland characters.   Somewhere in my attic I think I still have these figurines....

 To refresh your memories, that's Jack, the Onion Ring Thing, Secret Sauce Agent, the Der Hamburger Meister, and the Fry Kid      The Fry Kid was the one you want to keep an eye on.  He always had that somewhat comatose look on his face, like he is in the midst of a drug hallucination...  which would explain the presence of the Onion Ring Thing.  My favorite was the secret sauce guy, who kept the secret of the secret sauce they put on their burgers.   Later I found out it was thousand island dressing.   Another childhood dream shattered.

Hey, if you were opening a restaurant and wanted to have a mascot, what would be the one animal you would NOT want as a spokesman?  If you said "rat", well, you'd be right.   You also would be the type that has never walked into a Chuck E. Cheese Pizza Time Theater.  For some reason, marketing geniuses at this place decided that "rat" was the symbol of great pizza, and thus began Chuck E.'s reign over some of the worst pizza I have ever eaten.   Now to be fair, I haven't had the Pizza Time Players sing me a jingle in over 20 years, so there's a chance the pizza has improved.   But the mascot has not.   In fact, they recently gave Chuck E. a makeover to make him look more...   rat-like.  Chuck E. Cheese still rates with me a one of the worst fast-food mascots ever.

I never saw the Quizno's Spongemonkeys until I started researching this article.  I can't decide if I like them or hate them.   I'll let you decide...



While searching the Internet for mascots I came across Taco Man for Taco Bell.  He makes the Yo Quiero chihuahua look sophisticated in comparison.

What the heck is he wearing??  And why the human hands???

Lastly, I come to the worst mascot of all....   and it's a pet peeve of mine.   Why do Barbecue places always have to have pictures of animals cooking their brethren over an open fire?  This seems so cannibalistic to me.   It's a horror movie come to life...   and i am ashamed to say that it looks delicious.   Famous Dave's is probably the most famous example, but below are several other examples...  

At least the Chick-Fil-A cows try to get you to eat some other animals.

The Plumber

The Electric Company was a PBS show from the 70's that was sort of a Sesame Street for those who had graduated beyond numbers and letters.   They used sketch comedy and cartoons to hold your interest...   and some of it still holds up pretty good today.   Here's a favorite animated bit that used to crack up my sister and I every time we watched it.   I still use the parrot's line from time to time...

Food I Liked that is Gone Forever, part 1

I like food.   Who doesn't?   It's usually delicious, it comes cheap, and your stomach thanks you every time you send some down.   However, I have a problem - the foods I like are never around very long.   I must have the worst taste in food (as many of you will vouch for), because foods I like have a habit of disappearing from the market, never to be seen again.  I've seen it time and time again - breakfast cereals, beverages, fast-food sandwiches - If I like them, that's a sure sign that they are destined to oblivion.   My friends beg me not to try anything they like, in the fear that I will assign it the Kiss of Death by liking it.   In this new series, I'll write about some favorites of mine that have gone down the garbage disposal of history.

Summertime always brings back memories of my favorite candy bar of all time, the Milkshake Bar.   This bar came the closest to tasting like an actual milkshake, with actual malt flavor in the bar.   The Milkshake bar was first introduced in 1927 by the Hollywood Candy Company, founded in Hollywood, Minnesota.   The Hollywood Candy Company used real cocoa, butter and eggs in their chocolate, and was still able to sell their bars for cheaper than their competitors.   They also developed a synthetic coating for their candy bars that kept them from melting...  but also gave them an unusual taste and texture that made them unique.  They created a process to produce a fluffy nougat center for their candy bars, and the Milkshake bar was the first candy to utilize this process.   The Milkshake bar was a big hit and became very popular.   So popular, in fact, that other companies copied the recipe, most notable the Mars company and their Milky Way bar. 



Original milkshake candy wrapper from the 1930's. 

I'm guessing this wrapper is from the late 50's and the 1960's.   I remember buying this version.

In the 1960's the Milkshake bars became a very popular summer treat, and this is how I was introduced to them.   Many snack stands would keep their Milkshake bars frozen with the ice cream novelties.   Eating one was like eating a milkshake on a stick.  It would be to hard to bite at first, but eventually you'd wear it down and enjoy a creamy, chocolaty dessert that haunts me to this day.   I think most Milkshake bars sold in June, July and August were consumed this way. 

Late 1960's version of the Milkshake bar.

In the 1960's the Hollywood Candy Company was sold, and went through a series of owners before being bought by the Hershey Company in 1996.   Hershey still produces Hollywood's two most popular bars, Payday and Zero, but has resigned the Milkshake bar to oblivion.  Fans still bemoan the loss of the Milkshake bar, and several websites have sprung up (and Facebook pages HERE and  HERE) to honor the candy and fight for its return.  Even if Hershey would bring it back, it would never be the same.  That synthetic coating really added something that can't be duplicated.

The last version of the Milkshake bar from the 1970's or 1980's.  Leaf was manufacturing them at this point.  

Milky Way bars are as close as we will ever get to the old Milkshake bar, and trust me, it's not that close.

Another candy favorite were Fizzers.   These looked similar to Smarties candies (probably the worst candy ever) but that's where the similarity ended.  Fizzers "fizzed" in you mouth with a tart, tangy taste that put Smarties to shame.  I used to get both candies in my trick-or-treat bag at Halloween, and while the Smarties were snubbed the Fizzers were hoarded.  

 

Fizzer's haven't completely left us; they are just hard to get.   The original Fizzers were manufactured in Britain by Swizzels Matlow.  One family member came to America in the 1940's and founded Cee Dee candy, which manufactured both Smarties and Fizzers for several years.   Eventually, for some reason that can only be described as "blatant stupidity" they stopped manufacturing Fizzers and continued making those insipid Smarties. 

Swizzels Matlow still manufactures Fizzers in Great Britian.   However, shipping costs are prohibitive...   It would cost me $50 to get a shipment here.   I may be nostalgic, but I'm also cheap.  So, if anyone is going to Great Britain soon...   Can you help a friend out?   I'd be grateful...

For more discontinued candy, check out this checklist HERE.   You may cry...